Grace and Truth, Truth and Grace

My three-hour graduate class was proceeding as usual. I made a few comments and posed questions. My students contributed to the discussion and provided thoughtful input.

I love such discussions when students are engaged with the material, and at that moment I was feeling pretty good and very proud of my students. Then, out of left field, one of my students said something provocative and racially insensitive.

Expected to Intervene

I was surprised and unprepared. I didn’t respond right away. My delay was too long, because another student, clearly upset by what was said, verbally challenged the student who made the comment, and all of sudden unprofessional words were exchanged between the two students, and there was tension in the room.

I felt all eyes on me as my students, rightly so, expected me as the professor to intervene and fix the situation. My spineless response was, “Let’s take a break.” I followed the student who was very upset (i.e., the one who challenged the student who made the insensitive comment) outside and talked with her. After a while she calmed down and seemed okay. We returned to the classroom, and I continued with my planned agenda for the session.

20-20 Hindsight

I wish I could say that in this situation I said one of those arrow prayers and asked for God’s on-the-spot wisdom. I wish I could say that I addressed the situation right away with the entire class and spoke privately with the two students immediately after class.

However, that’s not what happened. I delayed.

Hindsight is 20-20, as they say, and in the end, I believe that God used my error in not addressing the situation right away to teach me some valuable lessons.

Ashamed and Inadequate

God demonstrated grace and mercy via His provision of wise counsel. I confided in some Faculty Commons staff friends and other Christian mentors. They prayed for my students who were hurt and felt betrayed, and for me as I felt ashamed and inadequate. I told one of the sisters in the Christian faculty-staff group on my campus about the event, and she found a one month-Bible study on leadership in tough situations that we did together. What a blessing to have these brothers and sisters walking beside me.

Eventually, I talked with the two students individually, asked my class for their forgiveness, and met the faculty in the program to explain my side of the story, as word had spread about the event. I know there are some who have not forgiven me. However, one student out of the dozen in that class wrote me an email that expressed thankfulness for my apology. I will never forget this student’s kindness and encouragement.    

Priceless Christian Friendship

God used my shortcomings to remind me of His love for my students and me. He reminded me of His gifts of forgiveness, grace, and mercy.  He showed me how priceless Christian mentorship and friendship are in healing and growing following challenging situations.  

The truth was that I didn’t handle things well, but from His fulness, there was grace upon grace.