Preparing Yourself for Spiritual Conversations

Dr. Bill Bright, Cru’s co-founder, said that “successful witnessing is taking the initiative in the power of the Holy Spirit and leaving the results to God.” In Cru, we believe that Christians are called to make the first move toward not-yet-believers around us. It is not always easy.

However, we can learn a lot from Jesus. He took the initiative with the people around Him and opened up the door for spiritual conversations.

Throughout His ministry, Jesus used engaging questions to challenge people’s expectations and soften their hearts. Jesus was an expert in asking the right questions in order to dive through surface-level discussion and reach heart level.

Starting spiritual conversations the way Jesus did is a habit many want to develop but find nearly impossible to maintain.

Why is it so hard to take those first steps? Below are some ways you can prepare yourself for these incredible conversations.

Barriers to Boldness

Can you relate to this situation? You are talking with a friend, they share something vulnerable with you, and you end up just staring at them, tongue-tied!

You might be able to get out a comment, but soon after, you realize you have missed a golden opportunity for the gospel. You have known this person for a long time, and that only seems to make it harder to talk about the real things that matter in life. Why is that?

This is due to a few different reasons:

spiritual shyness
a lack of reliance on the Spirit
fear of rejection

Overcome Fears

We all have different levels of fear or concern when it comes to talking to others about Jesus. When we look at the way Jesus talks to people about Himself, we soon see that He has the antidote to our personal barriers to boldness.

Jesus was casual.
In John 4, He started a conversation with a Samaritan woman over a simple drink of water. Once she responded, He used His listening skills to take the conversation into deeper things, eternal life, and her personal felt needs.
Jesus modeled complete reliance on the Holy Spirit.
He relied on the Holy Spirit to keep Him from sin (Luke 4). He got alone with God often (Luke 5:16, Mark 1:35). The best part is that He pours the Holy Spirit into those who believe in Him (Acts 2:33), so we too can have access to God’s power through the same Spirit!
Jesus taught us to fear God, not humans.
He shows us God’s special care for us (Matthew 10:28-31) and consistently demonstrated a concern for people’s eternal destiny above their present comfort (Mark 10:17-23). He taught that whatever loss we have in this world- relationship, money, comfort, anything- will be repaid exponentially in heaven.

When we fully grasp these three things, we will see that it is not up to our presentation to change the hearts of people. It’s up to God. We are just starting the conversation.

Jesus modeled complete reliance on the Holy Spirit and gave us the gift of the Spirit.

Avoid Christian Slang

Once we start a conversation, one way to help remove some barriers that others might have is to make sure that we are both speaking the same language.

We have started a podcast as one of our digital ministry strategies. Since this podcast is geared toward high school students, we have to be careful to watch our usage of “Christianese,” those words that only Christians seem to use. If we do use a technical term that most “not-yet-Christians” do not know, we take time to explain what we mean.

Instead of “sanctification” → say “becoming more like Jesus”
Instead of “sin” → say “bad things we do”
Instead of “testimony” → say “my spiritual journey”
Instead of “fellowship” → say “community”

It is hard to communicate without Christian jargon because we are so used to speaking about our faith using inside language! We can humbly drop the insider “Christianese” in conversations because we do not want to risk going over someone’s head (making them feel like an outsider) when we try to approach spiritual topics.

Once again we look to Jesus. He often used fishing terms and agricultural language to communicate spiritual truths. This might make Jesus’ parables seem confusing. However, to His audience who fished and farmed all day, these parables made total sense! He spoke to them in a language they would understand.

Furthermore, Jesus strongly cautioned His disciples against using many words or praying in order to impress people with their vocabulary (Matthew 6:5-8). His message resonated with those who were “poor in spirit,” the people who did not think they had life figured out.

When we care about people the way Jesus did, we change the words we use to better communicate with others.

Retreat, React, or Respond

Relaxing and clearly communicating are important in our interactions with others. But what happens if someone does not relax with us? What if they react poorly when we try to share our faith?

Let’s look again at John 4. In verses 10-14, Jesus turned His conversation with the Samaritan woman from a request for water to an offer for living water- real satisfaction. He turned the conversation to spiritual issues.

At first, the woman wanted to challenge Christ’s claim to have the answers to life (verses 11-12): “How can you know the truth? No one knows for sure.” This is not unusual. Some people may respond this way, even after we have established a friendship.

There are three ways we could respond to someone who questions us as the Samaritan woman questioned Jesus.

We could back off, retreat, and give up, trying to avoid offending someone.
We could react or argue, trying to win a debate or impress people with what we know.
We could continue to engage, inviting them to consider spiritual truth.

It is important to not get into arguments with people. 2 Timothy 2:23-26 calls us to “not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting opponents with gentleness.” Instead of fighting hard for our stance, we can take a posture of humility, kindness, and patience. We can simply let the truth, not our argument, be compelling.

The results are in God’s hands. “God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will” (verses 25-26).

We do not need to argue for God, but that does not mean we retreat either. Some people are unhappy and dissatisfied with life. This can make them argumentative, just like the Samaritan woman. In the text, it appears that she did not seem to want Jesus to back off and leave her alone. People who challenge us seldom do.

In fact, if Jesus had given up and walked away, it’s likely the Samaritan woman would have been disappointed. “Well, I guess He Himself is not that convinced.” Instead, Jesus kept His focus on her real need, not her reactions, and it helped her trust Him.

If we humbly engage with people who disagree with us, we will be treating them with dignity and trusting God with the results at the same time.

It is important to not get into arguments with people with whom we initiate.

Action Steps for Your Journey

As we wrap up, here are some suggestions that will help you take the initiative:

Pray specifically for opportunities to share Christ.
Pray for your friends and students by name. If God brings a specific person to mind, shoot them a text right then, asking to meet up.
Look for opportunities.
If you have asked God for an opportunity to share, then expect it. Your friend may ask a question, express a personal need, or give an opinion, hoping you will respond. God is in control. Take a step of faith. Care about your friend.
Create opportunities.
When people were not coming to Jesus, He went to them. This can be the most important and exciting part of your ministry. Create opportunities by setting up a special time to eat, grab coffee, or do something outdoors on a nice day. Be very honest as to why you would like to get together. Explain that, sometime, you would love to hear about their spiritual journey and share about yours.
Consider the immense importance of someone knowing Christ.
Jesus did the single most loving act in the history of the universe on the cross. Ask God to give you a heart of compassion to share the love of Christ. These Scripture verses will help: Matthew 9:36-39; Romans 10:13-15; 1 Timothy 2:1-4; 2 Corinthians 4:16 – 5:10.
Do not be afraid of failure.
The results are up to God. There is no pressure to share everything that you know about the gospel all at once. Start with sharing a piece of God’s love that connects well with them.
Teamwork.
Try pairing up with a Christian friend to pray together for those with whom you want to share (Matthew 18:19). Create opportunities together for team evangelism (Luke 10:1). Share this article with another believer who wants to share their faith, and talk through it together.

By Faith, Break Down the Barriers

For sharing to become a way of life, we need to be thinking and planning ahead and focusing our attention and concern on those around us who do not know our Lord. The more we concern ourselves with the needs of others, the more natural it will be to share Christ.

By faith, we can break down the “dividing walls of hostility” (Ephesians 2:14) in our lives, since Jesus already has. After you have shared this article with your friend, pray for a few people to initiate with, and trust God with the results.

“When you awaken each morning, thank the Lord Jesus for living within you and ask Him to use your lips to speak of His love and forgiveness at every opportunity throughout the day.” – Dr. Bill Bright

Next Step

Share this article with a friend, pray for the Holy Spirit to open up an opportunity, step into it, and trust God with the results.

Evangelism

This article is part of the Evangelism Collection. Read the rest of these articles to get an even better understanding of how to share your faith with students.

Sample Outreach Schedule

Mingling and refreshments
Welcome (3 minutes)
Campus ministry overview from the emcee (3 minutes)
Icebreaker: Famous Couples game (10 minutes)
Dating Game (20 to 30 minutes)
Student testimony with a relationship theme (4 minutes)
Relationship talk and gospel presentation (15 to 20 minutes max)
Comment cards (7 minutes)
Announcements (2 minutes)
Refreshments and hanging out (no set time)

The key is intentional planning with a relaxed atmosphere.

Game 1: Famous Couples

Choose an even number of participants and prepare a list of famous couples ahead of time, such as Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia or Romeo and Juliet. Write each name on a 3×5 card and as students enter, tape the name of one character on their back without letting them see it.

Each student may ask up to three yes or no questions per person to figure out who they are. They must also take turns answering questions when asked. The goal is to discover their identity and find their matching partner as quickly as possible. Continue until everyone is matched.

Game 2: The Dating Game

If you don’t have a lot of couples for this game, you could call it the “Best Friend Test” and have them do best friends instead. However, considering this party is about romantic relationships it is obviously better to have romantic couples playing.

This game is similar to the Best Friend Test you’ve probably seen on TikTok or shows like The Circle, or the old Newlywed game. (If you haven’t seen them, check them out). One person answers questions first, then their partner tries to guess what they said.

One partner leaves the room while the questions are asked. The partners in the room write the answers down. Then they come back, hear the same questions, and try to match their partner’s answers. Each correct match earns a point. The pair with the most points wins a prize.

The questions are light, funny, and all about how well you actually know the other person.

Dating Game Questions

For the girls (guys leave the room):

Which ice cream flavor best describes your relationship right now: Vanilla, Rocky Road, Peaches and Cream, or Tutti Frutti?
On your first date, which animal was he most like: Turtle, Kitten, Tiger, or Octopus?
How long have you been going out?
What is the most sentimental gift he has given you?

For the guys (girls leave the room):

Which Disney character would she say best describes you: Mickey Mouse, The Beast, Goofy, or Winnie the Pooh?
What song is “your song”?
What did you do on your first date?
What is her favorite perfume?
Which Valentine’s gift would she most like: candy, flowers, or a kiss?
What outfit is she wearing right now?

Optional non-gender questions

What is their go-to fast food order?
What song would they put on if they needed a hype boost?
What stresses them out faster than it should?
If they had a free day, how would they spend it?

What is something they are secretly really good at?

While relationships matter deeply to us, they also expose one of our biggest fears, the fear of not being truly loved.

Relationship Talk

Overview

The relationship talk should be short, clear, and serve as a natural bridge to the gospel. Valentine’s Day provides an easy entry point into the idea that everyone is searching for love and meaningful relationships, yet few of us have good models of what lasting love looks like.

This talk introduces the idea that there is a kind of love that lasts, a love that does not depend on performance or appearance, and that love is found in God.

Introduction

Begin with a funny or embarrassing dating story to lower defenses and help students relate.

The Talk

Relationships take a lot of time and energy, whether with parents, friends, coworkers, or romantic partners. While relationships matter deeply to us, they also expose one of our biggest fears, the fear of not being truly loved.

Psychologists often describe our greatest need as the need to love and be loved. At the same time, our greatest fear is that if people really knew us, they would reject us. Because of this, many of us wear masks and show only what we think others want to see.

Even people who care about us deeply can disappoint or reject us when we do not meet their expectations. That pain leaves us asking what real love actually looks like.

There are three common types of love people experience:

“I love you if…” love, which is conditional on behavior.
“I love you because…” love, which is based on appearance, popularity, or performance.
“I love you, period.” love, which is unconditional and unchanging.

What we truly long for is the third kind of love.

One Who Loves No Matter What

That kind of love exists, and it comes from God. God loves people for who they are, not for how they perform or what they offer. He invites us into a real relationship with Him where His love is constant and secure.

From here, transition clearly into the gospel and explain how students can have a relationship with God and experience His unconditional love.

If you’re not sure how to share the gospel, learn how to HERE

Comment Cards

Use a comment card to collect name, address, phone number, school, and grade. Include simple response options for students who received Christ, want more information, or want to get involved with your campus ministry.

Next Step

Plan your Valentine’s Day outreach early and involve student leaders in every step so more students can experience authentic relationships and hear the gospel in a welcoming environment.

Partnering with Other Ministries to Reach Your Campus

Groups like Cru, Young Life, and FCA each have their own strengths and strategies. Students connect with them for different reasons—it’s not “one size fits all.” We love and respect every group that’s helping students know Jesus. We’re on the same team, not in competition.

Here are a few ministries we often serve alongside:

Fellowship of Christian Athletes (FCA) – Students gather in “huddles” led by coaches, giving athletes a chance to live out their faith through the sports they love.
Young Life – Leaders invest deeply in relationships, earning the right to be heard before sharing the gospel.
Church Youth Groups – Churches are a vital part of every community. Many youth leaders volunteer at schools or visit during lunch to connect with students. Cru isn’t a church—we partner with local churches to help students get plugged in.
Christian Clubs – Many campuses have Christian Clubs focused on prayer, fellowship, and Bible study. They’re often inward-facing rather than outreach-focused.

Cru’s Approach

We share Christ as soon as we have the chance, then build a network of small group Bible studies. We train students to share their faith—through group outreaches, personal conversations, and larger gatherings.

Why This Matters on Your Campus

When you are starting or growing a ministry, ask, “Who is already here?” Sometimes a group has been serving for years. Sometimes no one is reaching that school yet. Often there is room for more than one group to thrive because no single ministry connects with every student.

If another group is already present, the best move is to connect. Grab coffee with their leader, ask questions, learn what has been working, and listen for their challenges. Your posture matters. Come in as an ally, not a rival.

“We’re not in competition; we’re on the same team.”

Stepping Onto a Campus With Other Ministries

If you launch Cru where another ministry exists, remember these things:

Speak well of them in front of students.
Avoid scheduling conflicts when possible.
Focus on students they are not already reaching.
Be willing to partner for events or outreaches.

The goal is not to win students to your ministry. The goal is to help them grow in Jesus.

How to Start the Conversation

Approaching another leader can feel awkward. Keep it simple:

Ask how their group is doing at that school.
Learn which students they connect with best.
Share your heart for students and where Cru could help.
Look for ways to collaborate rather than compete.

You may be surprised how often these conversations lead to friendship and partnership.

A Simple Way to Explain Cru

When someone asks what Cru is about, you can say:

Cru is a network of student disciples who see their school as a mission field. We help students grow in their faith through small groups, training conferences, and mission opportunities locally and around the world.

When it comes down to it, no single ministry can reach every student—but together, we can make a much greater impact. Each group brings unique strengths, connections, and opportunities to the table. By cheering each other on, looking for ways to partner, and sharing a heart for teenagers to know and follow Jesus, we multiply our effectiveness. When ministries work side by side instead of in separate lanes, schools see more of Christ’s love, more students hear the gospel, and more lives are transformed for eternity.

Next Step

Reach out to a local campus ministry leader this week and start a conversation about partnering together.

Sydney’s Story

From Grief to Purpose: Finding God in the Storm

Growing up in a Christian home, she always knew about Jesus, but her relationship with Him didn’t feel personal until tragedy struck in eighth grade. Transitioning from homeschooling to public school had already pushed her out of her comfort zone, and anxiety loomed as she struggled to find her place. Then, during the fall of 2020, both her parents contracted COVID. While her mom recovered, her dad’s condition worsened, leading to months of uncertainty. She vividly remembers the day he left for the hospital and the long, heartbreaking journey that followed. Despite moments of hope, her dad passed away on February 20th, 2021. At just 13 years old, she faced the devastating reality of losing her father—a loss that shook her world and her faith.

In the midst of that grief, she began to see God’s hand at work. During sleepless nights and moments of overwhelming sorrow, God surrounded her with people who cared—friends, family, and a community that embodied His love. Though the pain of loss didn’t disappear, she found comfort in the truth that this life is not the end. Inspired by Paul’s words about eternity, she started to see her father’s passing as a reminder of the hope we have in Christ. That hope spurred her to action. On a family mission trip to Thailand, she met students leading Cru groups at their schools, and the seed was planted to start something similar back home. Despite initial uncertainty, God provided resources, opened doors, and brought others alongside her to launch Cru at her school—a ministry that has been thriving for nearly a year now.

"Anxiety loomed as she struggled to find her place."

Her story is one of resilience, faith, and transformation. Through unimaginable grief, she discovered the depth of God’s love and the strength found in trusting Him. The loss of her dad deepened her desire to share Jesus with others, knowing firsthand how essential His presence is in life’s hardest moments. Cru has given her a platform to do just that—to tell others about the God who redeems brokenness and uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things. Her journey reminds us that while pain is inevitable, God is sovereign, faithful, and able to bring beauty from ashes.